A Look Within a Look Without: From My Book of Shadows

And So, It Begins

JULY 13, 2021

MOON PHASE WAXING CRESCENT.

I woke at 6:25 AM with Prince Edward using my abdomen for a trampoline. When he wasn’t doing that, he was using it for a springboard. He seemed to take great pleasure in alternating between doing sets of bouncy pounces and launching himself off my stomach onto the bed beside me. Each bouncy pounce was punctuated by a mighty “YOWLWLWLWLWLWLWLWLWL!”

I reached up to pet him, hoping to placate him for a few minutes in an effort to get another half hour or so but he would have none of it. Every time I reached to stroke his soft fur, he launched himself off my abdomen landing just out of reach on the foot of the bed giving a satisfied “MURRP!”

Finally, my bladder told me it could take no more of his morning calisthenics so resigned to my fate, I got up and stumbled into the bathroom for my morning necessary. I didn’t, however, perform my routine of washing face, and brushing teeth and hair. I had a headache from staying up until 1 in the morning trying to finish 11/22/63 by Stephen King during which I’d enjoyed 3 beers, so I was determined that after his majesty was fed, I was going back to bed.

I was successful and managed to snag another hour or so and didn’t wake again until just after 8 when the princely brat returned for another morning workout.

Once I’d had my morning routine and put on fresh clothes for the day, I bumbled into the kitchen to feed Eddy again and make myself a cup of morning brew.

While the cat ate and the coffee made, I fed my Dice World addiction and caught up on all the games that were waiting on me to take my turn. Then, I took my first cuppa and sinking into The Great and Powerful Chair set about having Coffee with Kitty Cat time.

I must admit, this is one of my most favorite times of the day but this morning, as I sat stroking Eddy’s fur with one hand and sipping the wonderful hot, strong coffee from the cup in my other, I found myself worrying over how I was going to incorporate a dog into mine and Prince Edward’s morning routine.

I’d spoiled Eddy quite a lot over the last few months and though I knew in my rational mind it would all work out, I still had worries.

There were other things bothering me as well. One of the ways Eddy was spoiled was, most of the time, I stood or sat beside him while he ate his canned food. When he’d come to me, he’d been so frightened of everything I’d found the only way to get him to eat was to stand guard.

I knew this was because a cat feels its most vulnerable when it’s eating, and Eddy had spent a great amount of his lifetime out of doors and had needed to fight for every morsel he found. He’d been badly undernourished when he’d come to me, and it had taken me some time to get him back up to a healthy weight.

What if he stopped eating while staying at the vet? I mean they didn’t have time to stand with him whilst he ate. I knew this and I worried about failure to thrive. I knew someone who’d recently lost a cat while she was in training because it stopped eating. Of course, the situation was different because the cat had been staying with a friend and the stupid woman hadn’t bothered to take my friend’s cat to the vet or tried in any specific way to get it to eat and I knew that my vet’s techs were some of the best there were and if Eddy showed even the slightest problem they’d see to it right away, but still…

When my cup of coffee was gone, and Prince Edward had headed off for parts unknown I made another cup and while it brewed, I stood at the counter doing my physical therapy exercises while enjoying the rich aroma wafting from the stream of coffee pouring into my cup.

When It was done, I made my way into my little office, sat the cup onto the desk and opening the bottom drawer took out the one-pound peanut butter jars I stored there.

I didn’t keep them for eating. Instead, I used them as hand weights and while my computer booted up and all the apps I kept running loaded I did the upper body portion of my morning workout.

“It’s not much but it’s a start.” I said to myself when the workout was finished, and the peanut butter jars were safely stored away out of sight.

Someday I wanted a treadmill and hand weights. Maybe an exercise bike with rowing action too but for now the physical therapy exercises and the upper body workout I’d learned from the ACB Community calls would have to do.

Settling in at the computer I checked my list of things to get done for the day. There was my friend Dave Light’s visit sometime between 11 AM and noon, then there were more blog posts to schedule for my time away and after those things were done, I’d spend the rest of the day prepping for the live podcast interview I was conducting with Cindy Hollis our ACB Community Events coordinator and my speech for Message Crafters- Toast Masters on Friday.

Of course, there were a lot of other things to do as well. I had to meet with Casey to go over my computer and make sure everything was running correctly before I left for New Jersey at the first of the week, I had to start gathering the rest of the supplies I’d need and figuring out just what clothes I’d take. I knew I’d get it all done with time to spare but still I was a nervous wreck.

Between all my worries of Eddy and what his reaction might be to all this, the things which still needed to get done and wondering what if anything would happen between me and Drew my mind was a beehive of activity.

I’d not spoken to Drew Gibbon at all since just before Hurricane Sandy back in 2012. I had no idea if we would even acknowledge one another or if he’d even be around. He’d retired some time back and though I’d heard he volunteered his services on campus I also knew he wanted nothing to do with me, so I figured he’d avoid me like our latest plague.

The realization of the damage I’d done during those dark days of my life all those years ago still made me drop my head in shame at times and though I knew with great certainty I was no longer that person, I also knew with that same certainty he didn’t have any reason to know or believe it if he did.

Another thing I worried about was what would happen if I somehow ran into his wife Peggy. I felt, with that same certainty that if she could’ve figured a way to make me disappear back then she’d have done so and who could blame her?

I knew I couldn’t go back and change a thing but going back to The Seeing Eye for a successor dog was for me a lot harder than it would be for the average student. I had a lot of baggage to check and hoped I could stand the cost.

Maybe my imagination would be bigger than my reality this time and boy did I hope that was so.

“Well, nothing to do but take it one step at a time.” I told myself as I finished off the last of my second cup of brew. “Time to stop woolgathering and get to it.”

And so goes the morning.

This is all I’ve time for now. I’ll try and get back later to write more. I want to start journaling in earnest again because I don’t want to miss one part of the journey I’m embarking on. Already people are clamoring for me to blog the experience. I’m always amazed when people show interest in what’s going on in my world. I find myself thinking, “Why on earth would anyone want to read this jumbled prattling?” But somehow, they seem to like it and I’ve even had several ask if there would be a book about it in the future. The jury’s still out on that but knowing me as I do, I’d say there’s a 50 percent chance the answer is yes.

For now, I leave you to wonder for the text signal is dinging and the email is pinging.

About Patty L. Fletcher

July 2021

Patty Fletcher is a single mother with a beautiful daughter, of whom she is enormously proud. She has a great son-in-law and six beautiful grandchildren. From April 2011 through September 2020, she owned and handled a black Labrador from The Seeing Eye® named King Campbell Lee Fletcher A.K.A. Bubba. Sadly, after a long battle with illness on September 24, 2020, King Campbell went to the Rainbow Bridge where all is peace and love.

Patty will return to The Seeing Eye July 19, 2021, to train for her second dog.

PATTY’S BLINDNESS…

Patty was born one and a half months premature. Her blindness was caused by her being given too much oxygen in the incubator. She was partially sighted until 1991, at which time she lost her sight due to an infection after cataract surgery and high eye pressure. She used a cane for 31 years before making the change to a guide dog.

WHERE SHE LIVES AND WORKS…

Currently, Patty lives and works in Kingsport, Tenn.

She’s the creator and owner of Tell-It-To-The-World Marketing (Author, Blogger, Business Assist), The Writer’s Grapevine Online Magazine and the creator and host of the Talk to Tell-It-To-The-World Marketing Podcast.

WRITING GOAL…

Patty writes with the goal of bridging the great chasm which separates the disabled from the non-disabled.

Books…

Pathway to Freedom Broken and Healed: Book One How a Seeing Eye Dog Retrieved My Life Second Edition as well as all Patty’s other works are currently on sale from now until July 31, 2021, at: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/PattyFletcher