*Author’s Note*
When I began writing this it was 1:03 AM.
It is now, 2:10 AM.
Journey Out of the “Big C” — I Went Away Again: These Are My Thoughts Upon Returning
By Patty L. Fletcher
March 1, 2026
Moon Phase: Waxing Gibbous
Great Gaia! I went away again. The last I knew what time it was, the sun was slipping down the backside of the day, and I could hear people going to and from their activities—laughing, talking, arguing, singing, and, at one point, a child screaming out its displeasure at having to do something it did not wish to do.
Oh, for the freedom of childhood, when it was okay if we screamed. Everyone put their arms around us, snuggled us into blankets, and rocked us to sleep. Or, if naughtiness decreed, they smacked us on the ass—after which, we had a reason to scream.
When you’re grown and you do it, they shove you away. WTH?
Currently, my life consists of waking, eating, cleaning myself up, and going back to sleep, with a few brief check-in conversations with family and friends. My dad has been great to check on me. So have quite a few others. I’m grateful for them all.
I’ve been sleeping away huge spaces of time, losing whole sections of the day. It’s lovely and disorienting all at once.
If I’m not careful, I’m going to sleep straight through the full moon and the eclipse. Although, to be honest, I’ll be nothing but a prayerful observer this year. I don’t have the energy to put on a full moon worship circle this month. I don’t even think I have the energy to attend one.
No matter your faith, you must admit: an eclipse of any type—especially a total lunar eclipse at sunrise—is a pretty impressive light show for the Kind Creator to put on for us. If all things are created in the image of the Creator, then surely a full moon lunar eclipse at sunrise is going to possess power.
I will be using that time to reflect on what is taking place in my life. This brush with something that, if allowed to grow, could have killed me has brought me up short and made me realize things I never knew could exist within my life.
I’ve received love in excess—so much that I cannot contain it all within. I’ve received messages of caring. Gifts of time, money, food, flowers, and LOVE! LOVE! LOVE!
The largest of these has been the care given to my big dog, Blue.
In earlier times, I’ve lain in deep pools of tears and depression, crying out to the darkness threatening to engulf me for someone to find and love me. During those times, I was filled with the certainty that no one could possibly love me. I’d been told that so many times by people who claimed to “love me” that I knew nothing else.
Those beliefs have been erased.
There’s no way one can be given the type of care I have been over these past few weeks and believe anything other than what is in direct evidence:
“I am loved, and the Donald Starneses of the world can all go fuck themselves to death.”
Crude. I’m sorry. But I’m not.
You’ve no idea what it was like to be possessed by that hideous, bestial thing—how I could have been so blinded by that creature of evil and filth is beyond me.
Now I’m far removed from those dark days of my life. I only look back in quick glances because I want to remember they were lies.
My life now is rich and full of truly wonderful people, and I’ve no need for any of the tripe that went before.
Now I stand bathed in the light of Creation, and I know for sure I’m alive and well. I’ve yet much to accomplish, and now I can get back to that business.
Tomorrow, if I feel as well as I do today, rather than expending energy on a blog post (writing really does wipe me out!), I will most likely spend that time working on my manuscript. It’s at a point where I don’t want the vibe to grow cold. There’s a story to be told, and I am ready now, more than ever, to tell it.
If we write what we know, I have new information to share.
For now, I’m content with the knowledge that I’m held firmly in the palm of the Creator. Do not presume to fear otherwise.
I’m in firm awareness of the fate of my heart.
I’m firmly aware of the fate of my soul.
That is something each must come to with the Creator on their own. No one else has the right to judge that.
“I come to the garden alone.” It means just that—alone. But not alone without the Holy Presence. “Alone” meaning without another to accompany one into the garden.
Each of us has a garden of Gethsemane. Each of us has a place we must go to face all the darkness within our lives, and only we can come clear and clean with our own Higher Power—that is to say, our personal relationship.
Your truth is not my truth, and my truth is not yours.
We are all one. Yet we are we.
Thanks to the Holy Creator.
Blessid Be.
Patty L. Fletcher – Author and Content Promoter.
About Patty L. Fletcher
Updated November 2024
Patty L. Fletcher is a woman of passion and exploration.
She studies the art of manifestation and is a seeker of knowledge and the wisdom to know what to do with it when it’s learned.
To learn more visit: https://pattysworlds.com/about/
If you have made mistakes, even serious mistakes, you may have a fresh start from any moment you choose, for this thing we call ‘failure’ is not the falling down, but the staying down.
Mary Pickford